week12

I’ve been essentially at home now for 3 weeks… having gone out once over a week ago for dinner at our local diner (there were very few folks there). Jim is still going to work, but he works with a very small group of folks, and all precautions are being taken. Michael is here, Kristin is in PA. Bugsy is doing really well. Sort of a status quo… I suppose. But with the added ‘bonus’ of being in a pandemic. Like everyone, I am concerned. I am concerned about running out of supplies, as (Jim) shops only weekly, and I haven’t been ‘stocking up’ on things since we moved here last May. And people are behaving badly out there… hoarding supplies that could help others. I worry for the elderly and infirm that I know, that will not fair well if exposed. I worry for the future of this world…. I worry about all the damage we’ve done to the earth, it’s creatures and plant life. I worry about how corrupt so many are… and how those in power are determined to destroy everything for another buck. I worry about the lack of empathy and understanding in so many of our elected officials…. and everyday citizens… it is truly a plague of grander proportions. But I also see the beauty of spring blooming regardless, of people helping others…. of pups who are willing to love; even though all they have known is mistreatment. I am trying to focus on hope.

I finished watching the Wallander series a week ago.. and this week I watched a mini-series called River. Both were really, really good. A bit dark….. but that suits me right now. Not sure what I will watch next…

I’ve cooked lots of good meals… taken snapshots daily (and posted them on my facebook page)… and am working through a couple books on my nightstand.

And— I’ve finally started working on a few ‘creative’ things… trying to set up some plants on the deck (I need to order some seeds)… and I made a necklace. (This BoHo inspired necklace is about 18 inches long, and features 3 vintage Magnesite beads in the front, sterling silver handmade spacer beads, and chips of multi-color Moukaite stone. The clasp is sterling as well.)

Take care… be safe. See you next week.

week11

It’s been an odd week…. and I am a little late in posting (I try to do it on Sunday). On the other hand, Happy St. Patrick’s Day! This is a photo I took several years ago, but it’s one of my favorites, and very appropriate for the day.

So, what has happened this week? Lots of home-cooked meals. Lots of binge watching of tv shows. Our daughter bought a van that she can live in and travel in… and it’s amazing. It even has solar panels. She went through her stuff, packed it all, and headed out this weekend on an amazing journey. I am so proud of her.. and yes, a little concerned…. but that’s the ‘mom’ talking. Our son has been busy with politcal/ protest/ environmental work. Jim is carrying on with his job…. and loves the work he is doing. Bugsy and I are the stabilizing force at home… and I am so grateful for his company. He is doing well, and getting braver and more animated as the days go on.

Sort of a status quo…… but I’ve also been revamping my Etsy shop and focus. I took out all the gemstone charms a few months ago… with the intention of re-making them all with sterling silver wire… but I cannot do that in a way that will keep the cost as low as I want… and so I am thinking of reworking those gemstones into ‘bead soup’ style necklaces. I think this will be an exciting new exploration; and it will be interesting to see if I can do pieces on themes around the metaphysical attributes of those gemstones.

With the covid-19 virus running rampant: people worried about feeding their families… paying their bills…. keeping a home….having insurance if they get sick…. so much is unstable and unsure right now. I have no answers. With my poor immune system, I am one of the ones at risk…. so I will be (continuing) to stay home. I wish you all love, I wish you all peace, I wish you all health and happiness. See you next week.

week10

ok. I am a day late (technically, almost 2)…. and I am sorry.

This week is so much of a blur, and I am not sure exactly why.

Jim was in Colorado all week… (probably why)… and my sleep schedule was off all week. If I recall correctly, much of my time was basically spent snuggling near Bugsy, and watching old movies/ tv shows/ reading and surfing the internet. … cooling good food.

There were a couple ‘stand-out’ things though. I watched an incredible movie called “Seraphine” (link: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1048171/). There have been some artists that I just feel so impressed and motivated by…. Vivian Maier, Henry Darger.. to name a couple). And now… Seraphine. Wow. It was an incredible movie… and I am blown away by her art.

AND—- after 20+yrs of making jewelry, tonight I ordered a ‘fancy” Wubbers set of pliers. They are made to be easy on your hands, and I am looking forward to that.

Bugsy! Bugsy has been with us a total of 2 weeks now (one week as fostered, one as adopted). He is eating more consistently: usually a good sized dinner, and maybe a snack in the morning. He is taking his meds well. He doesn’t drink much water -usually at supper, and after his last pee break for the night. He sleeps quite a bit of the time, but at least he doesn’t seem as nervous and shaky when he is awake. And, he is getting braver! He has even walked in the grass a bit… it’s been amazing to watch.

I am beginning to feel a bit better. I am not sure if it’s because spring is finally coming… or that I have (finally) gotten rested after years of chaos…. and the traumas that have incurred. On one hand, I am sad that it’s taken me so long to recover from the various deaths, job moves, home moves, etc… but on the other… there has been a lot. To be honest, it doesn’t matter, as long as I am indeed on the road to recovery. Here’s to the next phase!

week9

Hard to believe it, but BUGSY has been with us for 8 days now, and was officially adopted on Friday. He is amazing. Of course, he still has lots of issues, anxieties, and such… but he is making fantastic progress, and is a joy to be around. My days/ nights have revolved around trying to attend to his needs, and to help him be as comfortable and relaxed given his history, and all the ‘newness’ of being here with us. I have also pledged to work with the rescue group he came from… and will be helping out as needed with social media postings and editor work, and perhaps making some jewelry or do photography for future fundraising events. You ca read more about them here: CARING HEARTS RESCUE.

Beyond that…. the trees are budding, the birds are singing (there was even a cardinal pair that came to see me and hung out on my windowsill for a long while), Jim is on a work related trip, Michael is knee deep in social/ protest work, and Kristin is working on getting ready to travel. I haven’t made any jewelry, or done any artwork… but I also know that I have been assisting Bugsy, and it will come. And because this little guy is with us… emotionally I feel like I am ready to begin creating again. See you next week.

**also. For those following along with the mystery series that I have been watching; I loved VERA! It was awesome. Death in Paradise was pretty good, funny at times, and in general; cute. Agatha Raisin was kitchy and fun; but predicatble. Queens of Mystery was really, really good… but there aren’t that many shows. Nancy Drew was initially good… but then it got all woo-woo new age like— and got weird. It basically was in the same vein as the reboot of Sabrina. Then I watched Shetland, which is by the same author as VERA… and it was truly excellent. I loved all the character development, and the stories were very well done. Then I watched Broadchurch — dark and moody… and features David Tennant. The 2nd season was a bit slow.. but I loved Olivia Colman in it. Then I watched The Bay… which was meh. Strong female lead… but I just couldn’t get into it. And now I am watching a series called Wallander. Very dark and moody, and I’m only a couple episodes in, but it shows promise.

week8

This week has been ….. all the feels.

I’ve been keeping an eye out on Petfinder for a smaller, senior pup to keep me company. One of the rescue places that kept coming up in my ‘feed’ was a place called Caring Hearts Rescue. They are a local group (Fairfax County) that seem to specialize in senior, special needs companion dogs. One dog that particularly spoke to me, was a dog they were calling “Angelo.” ((His foster mom was calling him “Buggles”… and we’ve been calling him Bugs…. as in Bugsy.)) The short version, is that he came from an extremely abusive home, the wife in the couple passed, a family member then took the dog… but was very neglectful of it (and they had him for a couple years). The dog was then taken to the vet to be euthanized, but the vet convinced them to sign the dog over instead. The vet brought the dog to the rescue folks. They believe he is about 10yrs old, and a Shih Tzu mix. He had profound abscesses in his mouth and one on his face that needed medical care. He was on antibiotics, had surgery, and also had most of his teeth removed. He is blind in one eye (cataract and glaucoma), and gets eye drops now for the glaucoma. He was very underweight and malnourished. He suffers severe anxiety, and was not eating or drinking much. He is afraid of everything. The person that I spoke with categorized him as essentially ‘catatonic’ from the trauma. They started him on Prozac.

After a home visit, and several convos….. we went to get him yesterday. He is with us technically as a foster, but I fully intend to adopt him at the end of the probationary period. As with most abused pups… he will need lots of TLC and time. He also needs meds, special foods…. and help with mobility, etc. The main issue (at least for me) … is hoping he realizes that he is safe, and wanted. If I can translate to him/ convince him that he is loved…. I think the rest will fall into place. That said…. I need him as much as he potentially needs me.

As to other ‘stuff’…. Michael seems ok, Kristin is figuring out what her next move is going to be. Jim is busy with work (but we did have a great date night too)… and although I haven’t made any jewelry recently, I’ve at least ordered some supplies and sorted through some things… progress…

week7

I was finally able to clear out some books… and ‘treated’ myself with a couple new ones, in addition to selecting a few that I have that I haven’t read yet.. and a couple I want to read again. Hence, the new grouping of books on my nightstand.

Looking back…. this week has had lots of really good moments. Both of my kids are visiting… and it’s been great to have them both here. Kristin has done quite a bit of cooking this week for us, and has made some really stellar meals. The weather has been decidedly spring-like…. still chilly… but showing promise. Yes, there were a couple days where it was chilly and rainy… but I love those days too.

Tomorrow will be 4 weeks since ZeeZe passed, and I am still broken about it. That said, I have begun looking at sites that feature senior dogs in local rescues. We’ll see. I really miss having a furry companion.

And… I’ve been slowly getting back into being more creative again. I ordered some beads I saw online, and have sorted out several groupings of beads for earrings. I have ideas floating in my head for potential necklaces…. now it’s just a matter of getting the energy. Carry on folks! see you next week….

top row: White branch coral and fantastic tiny faceted turquoise from the Southwest

bottom row: red coral rondelles (dyed), rose quartz rondelles, pastel beryl barrel shaped beads , white druzy quartz, rutilated quartz rounds, tourmaline, sapphires, and garnets!

week6 - part 3

… more photos from our trip to the National Aquarium in Baltimore

week6- part 2

extra photos from the trip to the National Aquarium in Baltimore.

week6

This weekend, Jim, Kristin and I went to Baltimore with the intention of going to a tattoo event. The event featured several area tattoo artists, who were donating time and talent to benefit a local dog rescue. So, we went, signed up relatively early, and awaited our turn. As time went on,… we decided to go to a local eatery called the Handlebar Cafe. Everything was awesome! Great atmosphere, wonderful staff… and excellent food. Then, we headed to the harbor area. I am so glad we did! We walked around and were able to see several ships up close (The Chesapeake, The Constellation—read more HERE, a National Guard ship, and a submarine!! ). We kept checking in, but we were down on the list. So. Then we went to the National Aquarium. Yes, it’s expensive…. but SO well worth it. (see HERE) WOW! Absolutely amazing…. and several(hundred) photos later…. I can say that there is no way for me to do it justice. It is a ‘must see’ kind of place. We slowly made our way back to the tattoo event…. but after chatting with some folks for a bit, were were told that they just couldn’t get to us all. (sad face). That said… one of the tattoo artists works here in Alexandria… so I have the potential for getting work done there. It’s all good. It was truly an amazing short trip… and although I am paying for it today (and typing from the comfort of my bed)… it was well worth it.

It’s been 3 weeks (today) since ZeeZe’s passing, and I would be lying if I told you I was ok. I miss him so. Every part of me aches knowing he is no longer here. When we were walking around the harbor, I was greeted (and allowed to snuggle) a fabulous pup. He covered me with love and kisses….. and it was wonderful. (he was a Wheaton Terrier). It just brought to home how much better I am with a dog. I know there is one in my future (hopefully soon)… it’s just a matter of finding the right one.

I am slowly wading through some of my books. One of the ones I am reading is “Things No One Else Can Teach Us” by Humble the Poet. While it has not told me anything new so far … or things that didn’t resonate…. it is always good to hear/ read it and getting that validation. Plus, it’s really well written.:

“We never fully get over traumas, and as much as we heal, scars will remain.

That doesn’t mean we need to view those scars as reminders of our injuries, instead, we can see them as proof of our resilience.”

I haven’t worked on any jewelry this week… although I have sorted some gemstone beads out for future pieces. One of the ‘issues’ I’ve been working on… is paring down not only the supplies I have in the apartment, but the limits in my brain of what I should be working on. Life is short. Truly. We (I) spend so much unnecessary time and energy thinking about what I should be doing, what would be the most productive, or financially advantageous…. that I have unintentionally limited myself and my art. I’ve had some well-meaning (or perhaps not) artist friends advise me to concentrate on just one thing… ie: photography… or jewelry… or whatever. And while yes, it is good to concentrate perhaps to become a ‘master’ of your craft… it shouldn’t limit you in a way that you become ‘stuck’ and think you can’t do anything else. We are creative beings. Creativity lies in everything we do. To limit how we express that …. well, for me at least…. it’s impossible. So I’ve had guilt over ‘wasting time’ doing other things. People will love what I do… or they won’t. From now on, that’s up to you of course, … but it will no longer stop me from making stuff. How it’s received isn’t really my responsibility. Besides, it’s more for me anyway…. not the masses, so to speak.

So. I took a ton of photos this weekend. Obviously, I don’t want to flood them all here… so I will most likely be eking them out slowly over time. Til next week…. carry on.

week5

It’s been a really rough couple of weeks since ZeeZe passed. I am not doing well. This whole week, on the few occasions that I have been able to sleep… it has been compromised with nightmares featuring my mom. It occurred to me today, that she passed almost exactly a year ago… so I guess in some sort of twisted way, it makes sense. That said… I am cranky, and very sleep deprived.

I haven’t made anything really, other than a couple sort of ‘creative’ dinners.. … since Christmas. I (finally) was able to make a pair of earrings in the wee hours of the night. Just simple, long drops that have Snowflake Obsidian star shaped beads, vintage Czech glass crystal beads, and hand cast pewter charms by Vincent Cav of Inviciti Jewelry. It’s not much…. but hopefully, it’s a start.

I’ve also been trying to go thru our collection of books. I went through all the shelves, and grabbed a stack of books to skim and pass on to others. I am still working on the skimming part… but I am getting there. These would probably all be considered ‘personal growth’ kinds of books…. with the exception of the top book which is a vintage 1960 edition of The Herbalist by Joseph Meyer (apparently I had 2 copies).

I’ve just been devastated about losing ZeeZe. I look for him everywhere…. he was such an integral part of my daily existence, as well as being a loving companion. I miss him so. I find so often, that I am watching shows about dogs…. searching for rescue pups online…. reading about pups that others have… am sure you get it. I just feel so responsible about his passing, and wish I had had much more time with him.

And… I have been crippled by the news on the political front. I have severe fear for the future, especially with thoughts to what is left of our democracy here in the US. That said…. it’s a new month…. and an election year… so I am trying very hard to gather up some shreds of optimism. Stay well, my friends.

week4

Not sure where to even begin. This has been a horrific week…. what with the loss of my dear ZeeZe. I am beside myself… and frankly, lost. I know that there are more pups in my future…. and I hope that that future is soon…. but for right now, I just don’t know where to turn…. and what to do. He was such an incredible part of my life, and I miss him so. ((I have also washed and bagged all of ZeeZe’s things… and have designated large bags for various donation places. And, I’ve kept a few things…. perhaps for a future pup.))

Tonight Jim took me out for dinner, which was the first I’ve been out of the apartment since Monday. (and my first shower). I know that grief effects everyone differently, and I’ve certainly had lots of moments of profound loss…. but it never gets easier. … and each is unique.

Needless to probably say, I wasn’t able to make anything this week….. but I am going through some of my books so that I can clear out a few… and I have been watching some interesting mystery shows that have been quite good (Season ONE of Nancy Drew, and the first episode of Season !0 of VERA).

1-23-20

…morning light

1-22-20

I can't tell you how many times today, even just this hour, that I have looked around for my baby boy to see if he was hungry, or wanted a treat... or needed to go out... or just to pat his adorable face. I love him so..... and miss him so. Thank you all for your support. It means everything to me.

profound love

It is with profound sadness, that I let you know that Zerro "ZeeZe" Sprocket passed away this afternoon. He was completely loved, and will be greatly missed <3

Many thanks to Teacher's Pet Rescue/ Kris Arbogast who rescued him, and facilitated us being able to adopt him. To the Potter County Veterinary Clinic/ Dr. Lindsay Windsor in Coudersport PA for excellence in care... and sincere thanks to the wonderful staff at Companion Animal Hospital VA /Dr. Jennifer Kelly for continuing that care here.

week3

Hard to believe week 3 has passed, and I am still trying to recover from the flu. I feel (generally) much better… but things are still going so very slowly… and I haven’t been doing anything but the bare necessities. Yesterday, I was feeling a bit better, and Jim was awesome and not only took me out to get groceries and such… but he bought me flowers, and donuts. Last night I was able to sleep… and it was awesome. Hopefully, this is the start of me feeling much better… and I can get back to making things soon.

In other ‘news’….. I went through some of my books…. and realized I seem to have lots of “self help” type of books. I have always tended to gravitate towards these type of books. It’s a weakness, for sure. .. and I am sure that they whole “genre” relies on the fact that lots of us are just not confident enough with themselves. When you think about it… I think most folks just don’t trust their intuition enough. And if they are truly honest, they know what they innately need. (I need more sleep to be human, for instance). Reading self help books can sometimes become a trap. Part of the problem, is that what works for one person, doesn’t necessarily work for everyone. It’s not a one size fits all kind of world…. as much as some folks would like you to think it is. Plus, if you are so busy chasing an easy solution…. you are less likely to do the work required to really change. Here again, if you are honest, you probably already know what you need to do. It’s just a matter of doing it. So… one of the things I am doing this week… is skimming a selection of these books, and gifting them away. It’s a seemingly small task…. but one I hope to complete. That… and make some jewelry!

week2

To be honest, I wasn’t entirely convinced I would be writing to you here today. I’ve been incredibly sick….

Weirdly, I had a very similar “flu” in June, that lasted all of June and most of July. The difference this time, at least so far, is that my ears have been ok. As you read from last week’s post.. I had a migraine for several days. I was beginning to think that it might be easing up a little, when things took a turn on Monday and my head started filling up. Within hours… I had a fever, chills, profound nausea, a head full…. a chest full….a horrible cough … and I was overwhelmed. Monday night, I was able to eat some toast, but that was the last I was able to eat until yesterday. All week….. I was able to only tolerate sips of water or watered down juice. I couldn’t lay down without choking. I didn’t sleep for 5 days/nights…. other than dozing while sitting upright in a chair. I was a mess. I was taking Mucinex, but switched to Theraflu on the advice of a friend…. and that is what finally turned it around for me Friday into Saturday. Today, I was able to eat a half of a sandwich and drink some tea. I am not over it… but I think I have definitely “turned the corner”. And I am so very, very grateful.

Needless to say… I didn’t work on any projects, or take any cool photos. The photos for today’s post are just “happy snaps” I took just now… in the still of the night, here in the apartment.

week1

There is a saying in Japanese culture (and others I would presume) …. that you “fall down seven, get up eight.” The premise being, that times can be rough, but it’s important to “stick with it”… and hang in there. That it is more important to persist… than to lay fallen.

Today was going to be the very first blog post of the new year for my weekly project// weekly posts… so of course, chaos ensued. I’ve had a migraine for 3 days (the worst being today), hurt my lower back, and have been taking closer watch on ZeeZe, as he has had 2 seizures the past couple days. In short, projects didn’t happen. No fabulous photos of beads or art supplies…. no stunning sunsets of peaceful beauty…. no inspiring works to enthrall the masses. Nope. In fact, the photo is from our trip to the beach last week when ZeeZe felt a bit better (and so did I). Needless to say, it’s frustrating. Maddening. Defeating.

Life is like this sometimes. The lesson learned (for me).. is that life goes on. Tomorrow will, indeed, be another day. … and with it… opportunity for change. Perhaps this time of enforced rest is what I needed before embarking on the journey ahead?

Who knows. … see you all next Sunday.

1-1-20

I have had a blog (imported here on another tab) since 2008…. and I’ve written most every single day. Over those years, I have done a 365 photo a day project… also… every year. So that’s 11years of daily photos, and most always a daily blog post as well. Seems like alot when written down like that…. and I guess, it is.

With so many changes this past decade (plus)… and more so recently…. including a couple big moves…. life… death… health… illness…. money issues… family issues… etc… it’s been a bit much as well. This year, I really wanted to do something different… but frankly, I am tired… and more than a little drained deep down in my soul. I need to focus on my health… and getting some “joie de vie”…. back into my daily routine. I need to get a better sleep pattern… and make more time for creative pursuits.

So. One of the biggest changes (at least here)… is that I will be posting every SUNDAY. I hope to do a consolidated post that is a little longer, but more inclusive of what I am doing and what I am working on that week. To this end, there may be a project that I focus on…. or a series of photos …. perhaps more poetry and collage —in addition to my usual photography and jewelry. We’ll see. Nothing is “set in stone”… and I think that is perfectly appropriate… especially for this year. Won’t you join me and follow along? See you on Sunday….